5.24.09

12:01 am – 2:00 a.m.

I continue my country girl experience with some pretty funny people. One of which is one of my best friends, another is a guy who sometimes makes butterflies appear in my stomach. We drink beer. We have a couple of glugs of whiskey. Things are alright with me.

2:00 a.m. - 5:00 a.m.

Everyone begins to shut it down. Well, everyone except for me and the fellow who sometimes gives me butterflies. We sit. We talk. We enjoy the constellations that are impossible to see from the bright lights of the city.

5:00 a.m. - 5:30 a.m.

The boy and I have to part ways, as his job requires him to work on some weekends. We have a spectacular good night kiss beneath the Little Dipper. He leaves and I float off to bed.

5:30 a.m. – 8:30 a.m.

I sleep.

8:30 a.m. – 9:30 a.m.

I gather my belongings and head back to the city. I look terrible, I’m horribly tired and I need a shower to wash all the country funk off of me.

9:30 a.m. – 11:00 a.m.

I arrive at Bitty’s house, where I’ll be staying the night. She had previously warned me that she had a quick errand to run and wouldn’t be there right when I arrived. She instructed me to let myself in. I walk into her house and Sadie the Pug is there waiting for me with a huge grin on her mug. I continue to walk to Bitty’s spare bedroom, then notice that she left her stereo on and there was music on. What song is playing? Forever by Ben Harper which is my absolute favorite track that he’s ever done. In addition, I hadn’t heard it in years and years. I collapse into her couch. I think to myself, “This is where I am meant to be today.”

11:00 a.m. – 12:30 p.m.

Once I’m showered and Bitty returns from her errand, we begin to discuss food possibilities. She and I are quite similar in that we try to eat healthily and neither one of us eat meat. Things are different today, though. She’s hungover. I’m hungover. We decide to stop at a local restaurant and sit out on their patio and eat. We order three appetizers, all of which were fried. She ordered Dr. Pepper, I ordered Diet Coke. We ate, took a brief intermission, and ate more. Then, the rain started. It rained and rained and rained. She and I just sat there. Listened to it. Felt the breeze on our faces. Then, the rain stopped.

12:30 p.m. – 2:00 p.m.

Bitty and I retreat back to her house, when another great friend of ours decides to drop on by. AMV shows up and we all sit around and visit and begin to toss around ideas about our evening plans. We decide to cook something, but nothing’s certain. Bitty hangs a few pictures on her wall, etc. We then move on to the discussion of Halloween. I instruct these two ladies that I’m having the Halloween party this year and for them to start thinking about what they’d like to dress up as. No sooner than the words came out of my mouth did Bitty exclaim, “I have a Halloween costume!!!” Followed nearly immediately by, “I’m going to put it on!” She runs back to her bedroom. It sounds to me like she’s putting on a grass skirt. My ears most definitely deceived me. I was in no way, shape or form prepared for what was about to happen.

2:00 p.m. – 2:08 p.m.

Coincidentally, it’s about this time when our other girlfriend, AS shows up. She’s knocking on the door (which has a pretty decent-sized window that sits atop the door knob) when Bitty emerges from her bedroom dressed as…a margarita. It was the most spectacular thing any of us had ever seen. We laughed and laughed and laughed. What made it even funnier was the fact that AS walked into some seriously random shit. Bitty was crowned royalty for her Mardi Gras Krewe one year. Their theme was Jimmy Buffet, therefore, they made her wear a margarita costume. AS walked in on it, AMV and I are trying to collect ourselves and not have to run to the store to purchase emergency Depends undergarments.

2:08 p.m. – 5:00 p.m.

Once we’ve calmed down a bit from the whooping and hollering of the costume, we just sat and visited. Of course Bitty moved about her house doing little projects here and there. The three of us followed her into her bedroom, as she was preparing to hang curtains. The three of us sprawled out across her bed while she messed with the power tools. Par for the course, my friends. I think I even told the girls that we had inadvertently walked into the beginning of some raunchy porn with a bad plot. We laughed more. We shared stories. It was effortless, much like everything else that day had been.

We decided it was time to start making a grocery list. So, we did. And we headed to the store to gather ingredients that would make enough vegetarian lasagna to feed an army.

5:00 p.m. – 6:00 p.m.

We get our items from the grocery store and decide on the large bottle of Jameson. It’s gonna be one of those nights.

6:00 p.m. – 9:00 p.m.

We cook the dinner, we squish avocados with our bare hands, and we welcome the guests that arrive. We sit around with our friends, we visit and eventually, we eat. The food was magnificent, as was the company. We discuss television shows that we used to love (what ever happened to Pop Up Video? Seriously?), talked music and even managed to drunk dial a few friends who couldn’t make it. All in all, a great evening.

9:00 p.m. – 11:30 p.m.

In the midst of all of this, one of the guests decided that he would like to see Bitty don her margarita ensemble. Needless to say, we convinced her. It was priceless! We all laughed and laughed and laughed. Laughter was the undoubted theme of the day. Shortly after the margarita costume was put away, everyone started to make their way back home.

11:30 p.m. – 11:59 p.m.

This day was coming to a close. I had already publicly proclaimed that this was the best day of my life, but I couldn’t fathom what it would be like once it was over. I had lived 30 years without ever having a definitive answer to the question, “what was the best day of your life?” And now I had one. I spent nearly 24 waking hours with some of the people that mean the most to me, understand me, make me laugh and love me for who and what I am. While this day may not sound like much to you, it is now such a part of who I am. I learned so much that day. Love your people and tell them so. Appreciate what they’re willing to do for you. Reciprocate their kindness at every given opportunity. Live in the moment. ‘No Where’ very easily becomes ‘Now Here.’

I fell asleep two minutes after the best day of my life was over.

Goldfish, Beers, Baskets and Weddings

Hey there. Yeah, I've been (un)noticeably absent. Wanna make something of it? I didn't think so...

I have had lots to say, just haven't been able to force it out. I guess I'll hit the high points for you. Where to begin? The beginning, I suppose. Makes sense to me!

First, the bad news: the man of my house is no longer with us. Yes friends, Lamont Goldfish has gone on to the big ocean in the sky. It was startlingly sad. We all think, "It's just a goldfish." The reality is, that little dude was the best goldfish in all the land (Or water, in this case.). Anyway, I gave him a proper burial. Not at sea, but under the crepe myrtle tree in my parents' backyard. Anyway, another chapter in my life has closed. I don't plan on replacing him. Mostly because, he's irreplaceable.

Now, some good stuff, eh? My former guitar teacher and I have started to hang out again and I could not be more excited! I absolutely adore him and we have entirely too much fun together. He's been lighting the fire under me to play again and that makes me very, very happy. As evidenced by my lack of blog posts, I have been feeling creatively stifled for a bit now, but the cobwebs are beginning to clear. It's like I can breathe again. Ah.

I went back home to visit for Festival International de Louisiane and had an absolute blast. My dear friend, who I shall refer to as "Bitty" opened her home to myself and several friends during this celebration. Anyway, she's a magnificent gal who is helping me see things with more clarity. Also, she's about as funny they come and it was when she put several beers in the basket of her bicycle that I realized that she and I were really meant to be friends. I mean, the alliteration of that sentence alone make me giddy. Bitty puts beers in the basket on her bicycle? This is the stuff a writer's dreams are made of. Unfortunately, there is no photographic evidence of this, but I plan on remedying that real quick. I asked her if we can recreate the event for photo's sake and she has been more than happy to oblige. Pictures coming soon...

My younger sister got married about two weeks ago. Talk about an out-of-body experience. While it was a little weird, it was absolutely perfect and I could not be more thrilled for her. I had to make my mark, though! I wore a tiny, vintage Iron Maiden pin on my bridesmaid's dress. That, and the Chuck Taylors I wore to the reception made me feel a little more like me and little less out of place. It's the small things, I suppose.

I'm heading back down I-10 for the Memorial Day weekend. Hopefully, I'll return with good stories and even better photos. 'Til next time!

Today's Weird

In fact, today is so weird that I can't even begin to explain just how weird it truly is. I miss normal! When do I get some more of that?

I'll explain this in typical Jessica fashion once I'm able to wrap my brain around it. Until then, please send your most positive, ordinary, run-of-the-mill thoughts my way.

What's The Big Deal Today?

My one month smoke-free anniversary. That's what.

Is This REALLY What Single People Do?

In the span of less than 30 minutes, I have had two friends confess that they are attempting to meet their soul mates through online dating sites. Now, these friends of mine are great people! Any guy or girl would be lucky to have them. Perhaps I'm way outdated in my "old" age, but whatever happened to meeting people the old-fashioned way? You know, seeing some cute guy across the room and feverishly trying to muster the courage to walk over and say hello only to find out he's got a girlfriend anyway. Ah, those were the days.

I'm a single girl. I'm pretty cute. I've got a great sense of humor and most excellent taste in music. Maybe I ought to consider the online dating scene. I mean, I am new to the area and so far, I've only met one hottie who doesn't even own a car and takes ritual baths with each new moon. Now, I'm really open-minded and am regularly accused of being a hippie, but ritual baths? Yeah, no.

Thoughts? Comments? Concerns? I know I've got concerns...

Update

The burping is getting more out of control. I've begun to hone my skills and I'm getting better at it. I think this condition might stick around long after I'm done taking Chantix.

That is all.

Burping The House Down

So, I'm about a week smoke-free and I have to tell you, I'm pretty happy about it! In fact, I have almost forgotten that I was ever a smoker. I was truly put to the test this weekend, though. I had an out-of-town guest who smokes. He's the one who started Chantix a few days after me. Things are going a little differently for him though. The medicine is not working as quickly for him. Anyway, the point of the story is that he and I hung out, drank and even went to see Andrew Bird at the House of Blues (um, it was fantastic, in case you were wondering. I literally have no words to describe it.) and I wasn't tempted, even while he continued to smoke. I'm not judging or anything, I swear. Okay, maybe a little. It's just that now that I'm on the other side, I'm realizing that it's a habit that can only be described as repugnant.

Anyway, I'm experiencing a whole new round of side effects in the last few days. The nausea is still there, but only in the morning. My dreams have calmed down for the most part. One of the new side effects is kind of gross, but I'll go ahead and lay it out there. I can now burp like a 400-pound, beer-swilling man. I've read that this might happen, and let's not kid, it's kind of funny. Especially coming from a prim and proper lady such as myself...

Chantix is interesting in that there's a new ailment nearly every single day. I think I might end up with Chantix-induced polio. Or even Chantix-induced rabies. For now, I'm a Burpasaurus Rex and I suppose I shouldn't complain because it could always get worse. By tomorrow, I could very easily develop some rare strain of Chantix-induced SARS. Why don't we talk about SARS anymore? It's kind of sad. Let's bring that back in 2009.

Divine Intervention

So, today is the first day of taking the increased dosage of Chantix. I must be honest - I don't feel well. I feel mighty vomit-y. I know that isn't a word, but it's the best way that I can describe how I feel.

Wait a minute. Chantix helps you quit smoking AND gives you an eating disorder? I may have spoken too soon. This might just be about as good as a hug from Jesus.

It's Official

I'm on Day Six of the Chantix treatment and cigarettes are disgusting. I quit. For good.

Rain

On rainy nights, such as this one, I tend to turn on the more mellow tunes. I ran across Rain which happens to be a terrific song by Patty Griffin that has inadvertently started to mean a lot to me. It's scarily relatable, in addition to being a phenomenal track. If you're interested, go check out the lyrics. If you're not interested, then skip to the next post to hear about my Chantix nightmares. Or not. The blog police aren't going to come after you either way.

I'm walking on the wild side this evening. Must be the white wine-Chantix spritzer.

Dream Theatre?

So, I'm four doses in and I'm still coherent enough to post on the blog. That's a good thing, right? I guess it depends who you ask, though...

Nothing significant has happened yet. Well, my dreams have been more active. They're not horrible, terrible nightmares per se, there are just a lot of dreams happening in what feels like a short period of time. Some have been more memorable than others and some of them even a little funny. Let's not kid - me on an infomercial? That's comedy and you know it. There was one that freaked me out a little, but I won't recount it here. Mostly because no one else thinks it's as scary as I do. In fact, it's been laughed at on a few occasions. Thanks for the support, guys.

I met a woman who claimed to be clairvoyant today. It was one of the most remarkable encounters of my lifetime. She was able to tell me things and advise me with absolute certainty. I'm a big fan of certainty. She was completely confident in what she told me and I almost had no choice but to believe her. It never ceases to amaze me that there are enlightened people such as this woman walking amongst us each and everyday. Pretty cool, if you ask me!

Chantix For Two

It's my third day of Chantix and I'm still here. It's actually starting to make a lot more sense, too.

I decided to smoke a cigarette around 10:00 this morning. I was horrified when I realized what a letdown it was. Typically, 10:00 cigarettes are pretty righteous. Again, I thought I'd smoke after lunch. It was more of the same.

It's been three days. THREE DAYS. I'm already feeling myself smoking, not out of need, but out of habit and habit alone. I've not had a single cigarette craving all day. Now, the habit of just smoking for the sake of smoking? That might be the uphill climb of this battle.

I didn't have any unusual dreams last night, either. I was pleasantly surprised when the last song I heard before drifting off to sleep crept its way into my slumber. Lucky for me, I was listening to some pretty great music last night. Gentle Hour by Yo La Tengo = sweet dreams for me!

On a different (but not too different) note, I've insprired (or at least I like to think so) one other to accompany me on the thrill ride that is Chantix. He's starting three days after me, so clearly, I'm light years ahead of him. I'm kidding, of course. But, it will be so nice to have someone who can really, really relate to what's happening with this whole thing. It's always nice to have a partner in what we attempt to accomplish. It just makes it more fun. Wish us both luck!

I'm going to see Bill Cosby tonight with my Dad. I'm fighting the urge to make a sign that says something about Jello Pudding Pops. What ever happened to those things? They were staggeringly delicious. I'll have to ask Dr. Cosby this evening. I'll let you know what he says.

Best Voicemail Ever

Two posts in one day? Try to contain yourself...

I just received the best voicemail message of 2009. It was from a good friend who I've not spoken to in a few days. He knows I'm starting Chantix and I guess he was checking on which of the horrific side effects I've been experiencing.

"Just checking to make sure you're not dead."

Here's the million dollar question: Do I call him back immediately or do I make him sweat it out for a few days? I'm leaning towards the latter. It's funnier that way, yes?

Dreaming In A Vacuum

I know it's been a while since I've updated and for that I have no excuse. In my defense, I've been waiting for something really, really newsworthy to happen. Well my friends, that day has come. We've got lots to talk about.

Most importantly, I took my first dose of Chantix yesterday. I've been an off and on smoker for some time now and I would like to drop the habit. For good. So, I plan to use my blog to document my experience. The good, the bad and the vivid (dreams). So far, I've only had one weird dream. Last night, I dreamt that I was selling vacuum cleaners on TV, infomercial-style. For those that don't know, this is especially strange because until fairly recently, I've not even had carpet to vacuum. The reality is that I probably can't blame my waking dream of being an infomercial legend on Chantix. Truthfully, I sometimes enjoy watching infomercials. Don't judge me, I never said I was proud of it!!!

I just took my second dose of the crazy pill and I still feel relatively normal. I haven't had an upset stomach or anything. I am a little concerned that the suicidal (or homicidal) thoughts will start soon. Just kidding, I'm going to be fine. And this time next week, I should be smoke-free! That's exciting!

At the end of the month, I'm going to accompany my younger sister to see her most favorite (I use the term oh-so-loosely) "rock star", Britney Spears. This has been an absolute dream of hers for a long time now and when she asked me to go with her, I wanted to say no. I couldn't. It's just one of those sister things that will hopefully be fun. If I can sit through that shit without smoking, then I will have truly won the battle. I asked my sister if it would be alright with her if I brought my iPod to listen to during the show. She was not receptive, to say the least. The good news? I'm trying to convince her that it would be a good idea if she and I dressed up as our favorite "Britney."

I am on the hunt for a bald cap. Clearly, bald Britney is the only way to go.

Come Follow Me

I have a blog follower!!! I was absolutely ecstatic to realize that someone has started following my blog. Never in all my blogging days has someone subscribed to my blog. Don't worry, Tracie! I won't let you down. Oh, the pressure...

It's Like Someone Has Cut My Legs Off!

I can't log into Facebook. I feel like I've lost use of my legs. Or even my legs and arms. I realize how ridiculous it is to be so hooked on a Web site that I'm comparing it to quadriplegia, but that's how lost I feel. Sad. So sad.

This has been an odd, odd week. I've been in strangest of moods and nothing seems to suit me. I hate to complain, but we all have those days where we're just down in the dumps. However, mine seems to be lasting a few days. It will get better. Every passing minute is a chance to turn it all around. And that's a fact!

I think I'll take this opportunity to hit the sack a little earlier than originally planned. I still can't get on Facebook. The good news is, iPhone is allowing me to lurk on Facebook all I want. Thank you, Apple.

He Who Forgets Will Be Destined To Remember

Yeah, it's a line from a Pearl Jam song. I know it's kind of lame to rip off someone else's work, but the reality is - it's so damn true. The reason this particular song came to mind is that I'm listening to my iPod on my Bose iPod docking station. Yeah, I'm totally name-dropping (or actually brand-dropping in this case) but if you find yourself with an extra $300 laying around, I can't urge you enough to purchase one for your home. Anyway, I set the iPod to shuffle and it's been playing some of Jessica's Greatest Hits. Oddly enough, it's been playing a lot of Pearl Jam. It's strange, but perhaps I need Pearl Jam right now. I mean, you always NEED Pearl Jam, but maybe there's something more to it. I am going to think that there is more to it.

While my week has mediocre at best, two people very close to me have had outstanding weeks. It's honestly better than anything else in the world when two people who are dear to you are inching closer and closer to the things that they want and deserve. While their victories have been very, very different, I am equally thrilled for both of them. Good stuff!

In completely unrelated news, I have recently discovered that my dog sleeps about 18 hours a day. Just thought you might like to know.

Stupid Bowl Sunday

I think the Super Bowl is kind of stupid. I guess it's because I don't follow the NFL that closely. Unless the New Orleans Saints manage to get themselves into the Super Bowl, I will continue to call it the Stupid Bowl. And that's that.

I had a sort of busy weekend. It's the first weekend in some time that I didn't go out of town or have guests come to visit me. It was nice to catch up on some things that I've needed to do for a while now. I had a massage, went to yoga and took my mom to the movies. I also ran a few other errands and even managed to take a Saturday afternoon nap. It was weird. It was nice. It takes me back to the days when I lived in Lafayette and didn't have any plans in particular. I was the queen of weekend relaxation. And I didn't need a partner-in-crime. I was content to do nothing right by myself. I'm learning how to get there again.

Let's talk about yoga. It is not a joke. At all. I've been working out with my trainer for a while now and it's safe to say that yoga has made me more sore than some of the things my trainer makes me do. Don't tell him I said that though.

My mom and I ventured out to see Revolutionary Road today. I don't know if you've seen it or not, but if you haven't, you must. It's brilliant. Sam Mendes never disappoints. I've heard some people say they think it's sad, depressing or even boring. How crazy is that? It's an amazing film and I encourage you to see it. And if you haven't seen The Wrestler, that's great too.

In addition to the other nonsense I was up to this weekend, I also completed this Facebook bulletin. I'll post it here in case you're not on Facebook. Which is also crazy, but I'll address that later.

Rules:
Once you've been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with 25 random things, facts, habits, or goals about you. At the end, choose 25 people to be tagged. You have to tag the person who tagged you. If I tagged you, it's because I want to know more about you.

1. I love my dog more than I love you. Sorry, it's the truth.
2. I love my shoes more than I love you. Sorry, it's the truth.
3. I HATE putting gas in my car. Such an inconvenience.
4. I have more fun in my head than some others have in their lifetime.
5. I miss Lafayette lots and lots. Houston's cool and all, but I miss my peeps something fierce.
6. Austin, Texas is the best city in the south. Hands down.
7. Music is entirely too important to me. In my opinion, everything we do needs a soundtrack.
8. I love people who can handle my sense of humor. It's a large part of who I am and those that don't get it make me sad.
9. I sometimes practice my Grammy Award acceptance speech in the mirror. It could happen...
10. I am intrigued by animal symbolism. Native Americans have some cool shit going on.
11. I love my Sicilian heritage. I'm a made woman. Don't mess around.
12. I have been known to be bossy. And pushy. And a know-it-all. It's probably true.
13. I don't drink bottled water anymore. I only drink filtered water from a polycarbonate-BPA-free bottle. I'm turning into a hippie everyday. I've even entertained the notion of purchasing shoes that were made from all recycled materials. I'm not there yet.
14. I don't eat the meat and I've never been happier. Vegetarianism is God's way. I'm convinced.
15. Should I ever win the lottery (which would be a miracle since I don't even play), I would like to travel the world with no particular agenda. Just go and stay wherever until I didn't want to anymore. Then I'd go somewhere else.
16. I would like to kill whoever invented the StairMaster. It's just a cruel, cruel piece of equipment.
17. I haven't listened to the actual radio in a lifetime. I have yet to discover a station that plays anything that doesn't suck. In other words, I have no clue about popular music and I like it that way.
18. College was a much simpler time for me and I miss it.
19. I am obsessed with Mission Burrito here in Houston. I love it so much, it's stupid.
20. I think making my bed is a waste of time, but I will generally do it anyway.
21. I think text messaging is brilliant.
22. Actual phone calls with the right people are even more brilliant.
23. I am going to complete my book of essays very, very soon. Be afraid. Be very afraid.
24. My family is really, really, REALLY important to me.
25. The Office = <3

April 22, 2009

Is Earth Day. Go check out this film. I know I will! Some of the images may look familiar if you've seen Planet Earth, but I'm excited nonetheless to see Earth, Disney-style.

There I Go...Getting Old and Forgetting...

Yep. I forgot the address to my blog and was too lazy to retrieve it. I've got it now and I've written it down. So, I think I'm truly out of excuses now. Let's catch up, shall we?

First off, the last time we talked I was prepping for my first guitar lesson with Dave. Long story short, Dave was too much rock-n-roll for me. Yep, there's someone who rocks harder than I do. He and I didn't exactly see eye-to-eye on lots of things and I had to cut it loose. So, my passion for becoming a rock star is shelved at the moment. I've got other things to focus on, so I'm okay with that. Maybe later...

I've been really tuned in to my health as of late. I went vegetarian and hired a personal trainer. I've never felt better. And I'm not just saying that. I've never been one who's known for their athletic prowess, so being able to hang with my trainer for an entire hour a few times a week is quite the accomplishment for me. I'm proud of myself and can really foresee living this way for the rest of my life. It's a good feeling. In fact, I'm going to attempt yoga this weekend. I've been to yoga once before a lifetime ago and was asked to leave because I couldn't stop laughing. I'm not proud of it. I've not always been the mature adult you see before you now. (Insert snickering here.) I'll let you know how that goes.

In other not-so-interesting news, I turned 30 last week. Yep, I'm officially accountable for all my stupid misbehavior. It sucks, to put it plainly. I really have to be prepared to own anything dumb that I might decide to do. No more youthful impatience. It's just impatience now. The good news is that 30 is the new 20. That's a big old bag of you-know-what. That's like saying Tuesday is the new Monday. (Oddly enough, I'm nearly convinced Thursday is the new Friday.) Just something to make us feel better about where we are or aren't in our lives. I don't buy it. Regardless of what I'm buying, I'm 30. There it is. So far, it isn't so bad. Luckily, I know people who are older than me who have lived to tell about it. They say it isn't so bad either.

I always talk about music, so why should now be any different? (Or at least I did on the old blog.) I'm not sure where to begin. I've always been such a rocker chick and as I get a little older, I'm learning that it doesn't have to be in your face to be great. In fact, everything I'm listening to now could not be further from in your face. And it's so damn good. It's a nice change to not have someone screaming at me from the speakers. Don't worry, I still listen to it entirely too loud. I am still me, after all. It's not good unless you're almost deaf. And that's the truth. In addition, I'm gaining a whole new appreciation for the cow bell.