Today's Weird

In fact, today is so weird that I can't even begin to explain just how weird it truly is. I miss normal! When do I get some more of that?

I'll explain this in typical Jessica fashion once I'm able to wrap my brain around it. Until then, please send your most positive, ordinary, run-of-the-mill thoughts my way.

What's The Big Deal Today?

My one month smoke-free anniversary. That's what.

Is This REALLY What Single People Do?

In the span of less than 30 minutes, I have had two friends confess that they are attempting to meet their soul mates through online dating sites. Now, these friends of mine are great people! Any guy or girl would be lucky to have them. Perhaps I'm way outdated in my "old" age, but whatever happened to meeting people the old-fashioned way? You know, seeing some cute guy across the room and feverishly trying to muster the courage to walk over and say hello only to find out he's got a girlfriend anyway. Ah, those were the days.

I'm a single girl. I'm pretty cute. I've got a great sense of humor and most excellent taste in music. Maybe I ought to consider the online dating scene. I mean, I am new to the area and so far, I've only met one hottie who doesn't even own a car and takes ritual baths with each new moon. Now, I'm really open-minded and am regularly accused of being a hippie, but ritual baths? Yeah, no.

Thoughts? Comments? Concerns? I know I've got concerns...

Update

The burping is getting more out of control. I've begun to hone my skills and I'm getting better at it. I think this condition might stick around long after I'm done taking Chantix.

That is all.

Burping The House Down

So, I'm about a week smoke-free and I have to tell you, I'm pretty happy about it! In fact, I have almost forgotten that I was ever a smoker. I was truly put to the test this weekend, though. I had an out-of-town guest who smokes. He's the one who started Chantix a few days after me. Things are going a little differently for him though. The medicine is not working as quickly for him. Anyway, the point of the story is that he and I hung out, drank and even went to see Andrew Bird at the House of Blues (um, it was fantastic, in case you were wondering. I literally have no words to describe it.) and I wasn't tempted, even while he continued to smoke. I'm not judging or anything, I swear. Okay, maybe a little. It's just that now that I'm on the other side, I'm realizing that it's a habit that can only be described as repugnant.

Anyway, I'm experiencing a whole new round of side effects in the last few days. The nausea is still there, but only in the morning. My dreams have calmed down for the most part. One of the new side effects is kind of gross, but I'll go ahead and lay it out there. I can now burp like a 400-pound, beer-swilling man. I've read that this might happen, and let's not kid, it's kind of funny. Especially coming from a prim and proper lady such as myself...

Chantix is interesting in that there's a new ailment nearly every single day. I think I might end up with Chantix-induced polio. Or even Chantix-induced rabies. For now, I'm a Burpasaurus Rex and I suppose I shouldn't complain because it could always get worse. By tomorrow, I could very easily develop some rare strain of Chantix-induced SARS. Why don't we talk about SARS anymore? It's kind of sad. Let's bring that back in 2009.

Divine Intervention

So, today is the first day of taking the increased dosage of Chantix. I must be honest - I don't feel well. I feel mighty vomit-y. I know that isn't a word, but it's the best way that I can describe how I feel.

Wait a minute. Chantix helps you quit smoking AND gives you an eating disorder? I may have spoken too soon. This might just be about as good as a hug from Jesus.

It's Official

I'm on Day Six of the Chantix treatment and cigarettes are disgusting. I quit. For good.